Return to Main Quotes Page.

Quotes and Taglines: Season 3
Last updated July 26, 2002

Warriors || Three Point Shot || The Girl Next Door || Poachers || Inside Man || Vendetta || Fool Me Twice
Storm Warning || Red Ice || Dead Certain || Breaking Ground || Prisoner X || The Trance || Mirror Image
Finkelman's Folly || Sweet Science || Remembrance || Love Kills || Crossroads || Foreign Exchange
Neighborhood Watch || Night Shift || Sentinel Too, Part 1


Blair: Jim, what kind of dog do you think I am?
Jim: One that would jump a table leg.


Three Point Shot

Referring to Jim's "new" 1969 truck...
Jim: Are you kidding? '69 was a great year for me.
Blair: Yeah, I was born.
Jim: Well, except for that.


The Girl Next Door

Referring to putting Iris back in the trunk...
Blair: My mom always told me to put things back where I found them.



Referring to Jim's spaghetti sauce...
Blair: Maybe you should put that tusk in here, Jim.
Jim: Maybe I should put you in here.

Blair: 'I don't have a tent.' That's a good one.



Referring to Jim's undercover persona...
Blair: Yeah, but Bill Murdoch is supposed to be some howdy bob cowboy from Texas.

Referring to Jim watching Bonanza to get a southern accent...
Blair: Lorne Green is about as old west as William Shatner. Actually that's pretty fitting considering they're both Canadian, Jim!

Blair: Well, either you got yourself a lilt or you got yourself a twang.
Jim: I don't think I'm a lilt kind of guy.
Blair: Well, then you must be a twanger guy of kind, right, Hoss?

On a cellphone conversation when someone is with Jim...
Jim: Hello.
Blair: Hey, Jim, it's me.
Jim: Hi, honey.
Blair: Huh? ..... Jim? Yo, Jim.
Jim: Yeah, sugar.
Blair: Honey? Sugar?


Fool Me Twice

Jim: Oh, I'll use my best diplomatic skills. (salutes)
Simon: That's what I'm afraid of. (with his hand over his heart and leaning over his desk as if in pain)


Red Ice

Simon: Pretty soon the Feds will be all over this like a cheap suit.
Agent Mulroney walks in.
Blair: Nice suit.


Dead Certain

To Blair...
Simon (sarcasm): The breadth of your knowledge never ceases to amaze me.

Trying to remember name of town...
Blair: Pine-something. Pine Trees? Pinesol? Something like that.
Simon: Pinecrest?
Blair: Yeah, that was it.

Looking at a cropduster plane...
Blair: When flying was flying; wind in your hair, heart in your throat...
Jim: ...bugs in your teeth. a restaurant...
Blair: I wonder if the lobster is fresh.
Jim: Have two.


Breaking Ground

While watching the news with the volume way down...
Blair: Hey, hey, Turn this up.
Jim: Why?
Blair: Why? Because I can't hear it. You know, there's some definite drawbacks to living with you.

Tag...after Cassie leaves...
Blair: I think 'we should just be friends'.
Jim: Right .... You want some of this?
Blair: Yeah, I want some.
Jim: Bring it on, man.
(They do a chest bump.)


Prisoner X

Telling Blair to stay away to prison while Jim is there undercover...
Jim: You go anywhere near that place and I'll have to use your head as a football.


The Trance

After Blair does little dance move in truck...
Jim: Do that move again.
Blair does little pseudo-dance.
Jim: You got all the moves, baby.

Jim: Strictly an observer, eh, Chief?
Blair: Yep.
Jim: Maybe a little voyeur?
Blair: Well, maybe.

Jim: Let's just say I know a few things about secrets.


Mirror Image

After Simon refuses to let Blair go undercover...
Simon: No way. Absolutely not.
Blair: Why do you always say that? Why is that always your first answer?
Simon: Three reasons. One, you're not a cop. Two, you're not a cop. Three, you're not a cop.

Trying to get Chapel let him go after he catches Blair (undercover) using a payphone...
Blair: I'm calling my higher power. This is how we communicate. She lets me call collect.

To Chapel...
Jim: You're killing people in my city and I'm going to stop it.

After fight with Chapel trashes the loft...
Jim: Is the department going to pick up the tab for the damage done to the loft?
Simon (laughs): You're joking, right? (walks away, still laughing)
Jim: No, sir, I was dead serious.

Tag...discussing Jim's loft...
Cassie: You know, I know a really good designer.
Blair: Actually, I took a couple classes as an undergrad.
Cassie: So did I.
Jim: Well, good, why don't you two start up a business. This'll be your first job.


Finkelman's Folly

Explaining Jim's hearing...
Blair: Umm... A listening device... State of the art. Really new.

Referring to Jim and Blair...
Finkelman: They're quite a team.
Simon: Don't I know it. Jim sneezes in reaction to Simon's flowers from Amy...
Jim: Achoo!
Finkelman: It really is the flowers. I thought it was me.
Jim: No, just captains in general.


Sweet Science

At a boxing match...
Jim: I never thought you knew a left hook from a leftover.
Blair: I'm a huge pugilist fan.

Jim: So where does that leave us?
Blair: That leaves us with you buying me dinner.
Jim: Oh, really, how do you figure?
Blair: What do you mean how do I figure? You said you'd buy me dinner.
Jim: No, I didn't.
Blair: What's wrong with your memory? You did.
Jim: No, I didn't.
Blair: This one's for Roy. (fakes a punch at Jim as the elevator doors close)



Blair: Oh, Simon, isn't that beautiful? (puts his arm around Simon's shoulders)
Simon: What do you think you're doing? Get off me. (shrugs off Blair's hand)
Blair: C'mon, a little brotherly love.
Simon: Do I look like your brother?
Blair: From a different mother.
Simon: Don't you start with me, Sandburg, I'm telling you.
Blair: Oh, come on... (tries again to put his arm around Simon)
Simon: Get. Go. (pushes away Blair)


Love Kills

Reading fortunes...
Blair: You will love and be loved by many. Well, mine's right, what's yours say?
Jim: Your partner puts the dim in dim-sum.
Blair: Oh, that's funny, Jim. Did you think of that all on your own?



As Blair is working on Simon's computer...
Blair: Uh, it's crashing, sir. I don't suppose you have a boot disk, do you?
Simon: Sandburg, I'm gonna boot your disk from here to Seattle.

After learning where Blair got a program he put on Simon's computer...
Simon: Off the net? Why didn't you just call Virus 'R' Us?

Talking to Blair and Simon after they followed him...
Jim: Come on. I love you. I don't want you to go away mad.

Deciding where to go eat...
Blair: What do you mean, that place that says "country cookin'"? What are we gonna have? Possum-on-a-stick or something?
Simon: What's a matter with that? My mother made possum.
Blair: I got no problem. I could eat.

Working on getting out of a locked room...
Jim: Give me your coat.
Simon: Why don't we use your coat?
Jim: Because you're the Captain. You can afford a new coat.

As Jim is getting ready to drive a train to stop the bad guys...
Blair: Do you know how to drive a train?
Jim: Sure. .... I had a Lionel train set when I was 10.
Blair: Oh God...

Tag...after Simon and Blair leave...
Jim: I finally shook 'em.


Foreign Exchange

Jim's first description of Megan's pink fur-lined coat...
Jim: She looks like Cruella De Vil.
...and later...
Jim: What is that? Pink dingo?

During car chase through airport garage...
Megan: Shoot the tires out.
Blair: With what? I don't have a gun. I'm a consultant.

Damage to Simon's new car during the airpot garage chase...
Jim: We only need one mirror.
....and later....
Simon: Just go while we still have four tires.

After the chase is over...looking at Simon's very beat-up car...
Jim: A little bond-o, some paint, it'll be good as new.
Jim slaps the hood -- and the driver's door falls off.

Wondering why Jim wrecks cars...
Simon: Did someone hit you on head with a toy car as a child?

To Simon after seeing Simon's pink rental car...
Blair: Hey, hey, if it isn't Huggy Bear. Jim and Blair watch Megan kickbox by mirror in gym...
Jim: All right, here's what we do, Chief. We scour the zoos to find a demented kangaroo.
Blair: Good.
Jim: Teach him how to box.
Blair: Good.
Jim: Toss the two into a ring together.
Blair: Shazam!
Jim: I dig it. A little Aussie grudge match.
Blair: Yeah.
Jim: Isn't that cruelty to animals, though?
Blair: Hmmm, yeah.
Jim: Which one?
Both guys laugh.


Neighborhood Watch

Explaining what Jim and Megan's cover will be...
Simon: Your cover will be you're a couple.
Jim: A couple of what?
Simon: Newlyweds.

Wondering what to bring to neighborhood gathering...
Blair: Should we bring cookies?

Looking at Blair's breakfast...
Megan: What is that?
Blair: An algae shake. I have one every morning.
Megan: How do you get used to the smell?
Jim: You don't.

Tag...referring to Jim and Megan...
Simon: Is it just my imagination or are those two still not getting along?
Blair: Tell me about it. I did the best I could, sir.
Simon: Sandburg, I put you here to keep an eye on them.
Blair: What?!? Wrong. You put me here so they wouldn't kill each other. I'm not a therapist. I'm an anthropologist.
Simon: Well, then maybe you should consider supplementing your degree. Go to night school! Do something!


Night Shift

To teenage boy after he drives a car through the lobby window...
Simon: I hadn't pictured our lobby as an open patio. Where were you last summer when the air conditioning went down?

Referring to helping Megan at crime scene...
Jim: I'll guide her through it, Captain.
Simon: Jim, that's guide, not drag.

As he hears someone wailing the blues on the PA...
Simon: I couldn't have said it better myself... Wait a minute... Someone please get Howling Wolf off my P.A. system!

To Jim...
Gabe: You didn't answer him. What good does it do for a man to have ears that will hear for a thousand miles if he cannot listen to the whispers of his own heart.... You should start by listening to the hearts of others.